ThisIsMyMomentForLife

I fly with the stars in the sky. I am no longer tryin to survive. I believe that life is a prize. But to live doesn't mean you're alive. Don't worry about me and who I fire. I get what I desire, its my empire. And yes I call the shots, I am the umpire. I sprinkle holy water upon the vampire. In this very moment I'm king. In this very moment I slay Goliath with a sling. In this very moment I bring. Put it on everything, and I will retire with the ring. And I will retire with the CROWN, yes. No I'm not lucky I'm blessed, yes. Clap for the heavyweight champ, me. But I couldn't do it all alone, we. Young Money raised me, grew up out in Baisley. Southside Jamacia, Queens and its crazy. Cuz I'm still hood, Hollywood couldn't change me. Shout out to my haters, sorry that you couldn't phase me. MOMENT4LIFE

Friday, March 23, 2012

Stressing.Me.Out

I cannot stand being this big. In the 220s is too much fat. I honestly want to disappear && return when I hit my goal weight of 177lbs. The little things are stressing me out. Like the sound of my legs rubbing together in my pants. My boobs popping out my bra because my boobs are too big. The ponch in front of my body. The cellulite. My fat face. Its all driving me purely insane.  I just want to get this journey done and over with so that I can move on with my life! I wanna be a strength trainer but no one is going to want a FAT perso telling them how to build muscle and power. That just isnt right. I'm so sick of being this way.  The worst part is that no one (none of my friends/family) understand HOW HARD IT IS TO LOSE WEIGHT! Like they truly have no idea.  I mean they might say they do, but I know they really don't.  Its so hard!

Everything is stressing me out. I mean I  am seriously considering dropping out of school to get my health straight then going back when I'm in shape. This weight loss is preventing me from doing anything else. Its always on my mind, driving me crazy! How much longer will this last!?

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